16 JUNE 2016; 

The fire used to burn, all the words used to hurt

But you're not like us, you are different

I couldn't see that that was a compliment

Cause the last thing I want now is to be you

And the flames don't feel as hot as they use to

Burn, 

They used to yell

You thought I was coal

My friend, I'm gold

Can't you tell?

Cause I'm not weak, I'm not broken I am bold

And the fire you put me through turned me into gold

I'm not done, I'm no loser

Watch me take on my bright future

Tonight I'm no bronze I'm no silver

You'll be thinking, damn I knew her

But you didn't

Don't get it twisted

Out of the ashes you buried me in

I am golden

You tried so hard to break me down

Like a fire-breathing dragon, but I guess I took your crown

You pushed for me to change for you

But I'm so glad that I stayed true to who I am

The fire that you tried to burn me with, it made me who I am

All the things that you said I couldn't do

Guess what, Yes I can

2 June 2016;

How do you call yourself an extroverted introvert? Well, I personally have no clue about it at all. Some say that this kind of people like to talk a lot, but it depend on the situation. Let say you go to a social event that require you to meet and speak with different people, so you have to become a little extrovert on that day to cope with the situation. But after that you will likely to shut yourself up in a room and be alone all by yourself after all the hassle. Mean to say that you only become an extrovert when you need to just to cover up your weakness, perhaps. Am i correct? Well, correct me if I'm wrong. Anyway, you can definitely find this type of people in this world right now. Believe me, because I think I'm one of them. Though maybe this might not be true but aware of it or not, this sounds like you're being yourself, but you're not exactly yourself. Get what I mean? 

Okay, so long story short, the reason why I'm talking about personality all of sudden is because I've talked about this topic today with my friends which give me the idea on what to write on my blog. So that's how I came out with this topic. Actually, we went out to make our visa in the French Embassy. We watched movie and then we all went to Franco to have a drink and chit chatting. Speaking of movie, allow me to diverse our topic for a second to tell you about the movie that we've just watched. It's called "Me Before You'', based on a novel written by Jojo Moyes. 

May I say this is like a movie review for those who still don't watch 'Me Before You'. So heads up people, this is definitely the type of movie that will make you cry your heart out and bring your tears  down no matter what. It is such a beautiful movie the fact that Sam Claflin is so freaking hot! O my God! I don't know if it's just me or anyone else but when I watched this movie I swear I am lost at thought throughout the whole movie. What I mean to say is that I am no where to be found in the real world. I imagined things and daydreamed. It gives me a real feeling on every scene shown in the movie. I gave 100% of my mind, thoughts, and focus to the movie and I literally don't care what happen around me at all. So this movie "Me Before You" really give me these sort of impressions so to speak. I don't like to be a spoiler but I think you guys should definitely need to watch it as the movie itself is very beautiful and amazing. 

Much love

Tia 

27 May 2016;

Wanderlust. A strong desire to travel and explore the world. Who knows twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than the ones you did do. Take this time and opportunities that you have to sail away from the safe harbor, explore, dream and discover. Anywhere our feet and our hearts take us...we should go, experience and breathe something new. It's not like we have the same opportunity again in our lifetime. Today's travelling is not the same as that of years ago because thanks to technology, no longer we can feel homesick from places we have never been before. It only takes a second for us to call home and talk with our love ones. So why do we bother to keep on hold of our dreams the moment we know all of that is definitely possible today.

I am the kind of person who values experience more than money will ever be. The experience that can never be bought with money. Hence, why I wish to put my wanderlust as primary. I haven't been to many places before but I have it all on my wishlist. Of course, like I said it's not wrong to dream because the future will take you there when you believe in it. What most of us don't realize all the time, is the decision that we make are mostly at the expense of someone else. The decisions that are hinder by the opinions and feelings of other people. At least I'm aware of it. It's up to you guys to believe me or not but I believe desire and faith come in handy when you feel like giving up. 

So not long ago, I've made a life-changing decision that I believe will help me for my future endeavors. Let alone all the negative mindset I choose to follow my own path and making my own decision for what I want to be one day. I have to admit that it is not easy to make a decision that can satisfy everyone....come to think of it, it is you who decide what's best for you. The choice is in your hand. 

Et voila, peut-etre qu'il est un peu vague pour dire cela, mais  je pense que j'ai choisi la bonne voie. Comme ca, je suis sure que j'aurais une bonne qualite de vie. Je voyagerais, decouvrirais des nouvelles choses, rencontrerais des gens...et bien, ce qui est tres important, c'est que moi, je serais tres heureux! 

A bientot! 

Much love, Tia

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25 May 2016;

 

Never have I imagined that life could turn out to be so wonderful when you least expect it. When I think of how far I have come in the last few years I was filled with anxiety. So much until i realized that things have becoming a lot better than before. I don't really know how to say this but as much as I really want to escape the walls that were built inside me, I am so grateful that I get to experienced the bittersweet of life. It's not like I want to give an image of a fairytale, perfect, everything else, just simply being original.

Most telling of all, this has nothing to do with life and death people! And it has brought my attention to tell everyone that I will soon begin a new chapter of my life! So that's why I made this new blog and decided to delete my old account. Trust me, you never want to go back and read any of my old entry because it was so embarrassing!!!! It reminds me of when I started to blog. I was 13 years old back then if I'm not mistaken. Smiling and laughing at my own lovey dovey story O my gosh I could never forget the time when I wrote on how I felt about this one guy and it was so hilarious. That was like 7 years ago and the next thing I knew I became my own laughing stock. It feels like you're completely naked in front of a million strangers even though you're fully clothed. 

So what is this fresh new start is all about? I guess you could tell by how excited I am right now writing my first entry of the year after so long. I don't want to repeat the same mistake again. It feels kinda awkward actually and I don't really know how to create a more tidy and clean writing because that's just how I am. I write because I want to let the world know how I feel. Because maybe that's the only way for me to release my stress. I just thought that how nice it would be to share some of my stories to the world. There are no rules here and of course, you are free to write whatever you want. I don't expect much from you guys only that I greatly appreciate your support. Honestly speaking, I don't really mind about what others would say about me. Don't mind me because either a good thing or a bad thing I will accept it with an open heart. 

I'm sure by now everyone is absolutely exhausted of hearing me express my feeling. Actually, I know for a fact that you're all tired of it. I got it folks. But as I said earlier I'm sort of a person who like to "hash out" my feelings verbally and on my blog. I'm just gonna keep doing what I do best....writing about my own personal struggles to make you feel better about your own. After all, I'm just a girl who is trying to get my mind straight so if ever you feel like this is stupid and boring you are welcome to leave this page. Till then.

Much love.

Tia

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